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The 'Adult' Test
Think you hate tequila? No, you just hate the cheap sugar-syrup blend you drank in college. Here is how to fix it.
Most people have a traumatic tequila story involving lemon, salt, and a headache that lasted two days. Because of this, they swear off the spirit forever. But here is the hard truth: You probably weren't drinking tequila. You were drinking 'Mixto'—a legal loophole that allows brands to sell you a mix of 51% agave spirit and 49% cheap cane sugar syrup. The headache wasn't the alcohol; it was the sugar spike. The 'Adult Test' is simple: Does the label say '100% Agave'? If not, you are still drinking at the kids' table.
The 51/49 Scam
Mexican law allows a bottle to be labeled 'Tequila' even if only 51% of the alcohol comes from the Blue Weber Agave plant. The remaining 49% can be any cheap neutral spirit made from corn or cane sugar.
KNOW YOUR ENEMY
The Salt & Lemon Lie
💡 THE MASK
The ritual of licking salt and sucking a lemon wasn't invented to be fun. It was invented to kill the harsh, chemical burn of cheap Mixto tequila. Good tequila (Reposado or Añejo) is meant to be sipped neat, like a scotch.
What to Buy Instead
- •Don't look for 'Gold'. That is usually food coloring.
- •Look for 'Blanco' (Unaged) or 'Reposado' (Rested) labeled 100% Agave.
- •Brands like Jose Cuervo Tradicional, Patron, or Don Julio pass the test. Standard Cuervo Gold does not.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is silver tequila always better than gold?
Generally, yes. Cheap brands use 'Gold' to mean 'added caramel color'. However, high-end 'Gold' (Joven) can be a blend of aged tequilas. Always check for '100% Agave'.
Does 100% Agave mean zero hangover?
No alcohol is hangover-proof if you drink too much. But removing the 49% sugar syrup significantly reduces the dehydration and headache severity the next morning.
Published: 2026-04-15
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